The Irony

I was driving down the road when Kelly Clarkson’s “Piece by Piece” song played. It was a song I had always related to so well. Though our stories differ a bit with our father’s – her father abandoned her while mine was an abusive narcissist – I could certainly relate to her sentiments towards her father depicted in the song. Likewise, I always listened to the lyrics with such an appreciation for my husband, just as Kelly sung fondly about her husband, Brandon  Blackstock. In our stories, our husbands were our heroes. They were the only men who had come into our lives and shown us an unconditional love, and respect. They were men to be looked up to, and men who we entrusted to be so much better for our children. The last chorus goes like this: 
“Piece by piece, I fell far from the tree
I will never leave her like you left me
And she will never have to wonder her worth
Because unlike you, I’m gonna put her first and you know
He’ll never walk away
He’ll never break her heart
He’ll take care of things, he’ll love her
Piece by piece, he restored my faith
That a man can be kind and the father should be great”
As I listened, these are the words that burned, stinging so hard I lost my breath while my heart physically hurt. I did fall far from the tree and I didn’t leave our kids. But they certainly have questioned their worth. They’ve suffered greatly after he walked away, breaking their hearts and leaving SO much for the rest of us to take care of, while trying to gather the million shattered pieces. Piece by piece he had restored our faith, but only to shatter it himself, which I think has been worse. I don’t know the details of Kelly’s story with Brandon – only that they’re no longer married. But the irony that a song that had so much truth and meaning for both of us just a  short time ago and now been destroyed struck hard. I reflected on the admiration, appreciation and respect I had had for my then husband, yet it still wasn’t enough. It’s just more proof that even when you feel strong and secure in your marriage, it only takes a small open crack for Satan to step in and open Pandora’s box, unleashing destruction. And in reading interviews from Kelly Clarkson since the filing of their divorce, she and I still agree, but this time it’s on the subject of divorce. Divorce is horrible – one of the hardest things anyone can ever go through, and it’s devastating to kids, no matter their age.